As any parent will tell you, a crying baby can be very stressful to deal with. To help you learn how to tolerate a crying baby, it's good to start understand why babies cry in the first place.
Crying babies are telling us something is not okay and they need our help. The challenge and tricky part is trying to figure out what the baby needs. It's important to note that if your babies cry sounds different than usual and you sense she may be sick, contact your doctor right away. Always err or the side of caution.
Try to calm your baby by comforting him. In your babies first few weeks, it feels uncertain of the new world around him. Reassure the baby that he's safe and you're there to protect him. Give your baby a hug and cradle him in your arms, whispering words of love. Also try holding the baby in different positions to find which he prefers. Some babies prefer being held stomach down or over the shoulder. If the baby continues crying, try to deduct why. Here are the most common reasons:
"Baby is hungry, even if she recently was fed, she may still be hungry
"Baby has soiled her diaper and needs a change
"Baby is uncomfortable, maybe too cold or too hot, or her clothing is restrictive
"Baby is having a hard time sleeping due to noise in the home. Sometimes the opposite is the case where babies prefer some background noise or music. Find out which environment your baby prefers
"Baby needs physical contact with you. If you're busy with other chores, try using a baby sling. This will provide her with the contact she needs and still allows you to do some other chores.
Be aware that some babies just naturally cry more than others for no apparent reason. Studies show that babies cry on average for about two hours daily and tend to cry less after about three months of age. For new parents it can be extremely frustrating dealing with a crying baby especially if they're also sleep deprived. Practice patience as much as possible but be aware of your emotions towards the baby. You may have feelings of anger, depression or helplessness. It's important to tell yourself in these cases that your baby is helpless and is not trying to spite you. Babies are not spoiled, they are innocent newcomers to a new world they don't understand.
When feeling frustrated, try to get someone to help you care for the baby while you take a break. Some time to yourself will be very beneficial. If you are by yourself and are having feelings of anger or resentment towards the baby, it's best to place the baby in a safe place and leave the room. Never handle a baby roughly. Babies can be harmed if shaken! Their necks are very fragile and don't yet support their heads well. If you feel like handling the baby in a rough manner, walk away. Studies show that baby crying is the number one trigger for harmful baby shaking. Try going outside and taking some deep relaxing breaths or phone a supportive friend, who can help walk you through the moment. When you feel calmer and in a better state of mind, you can go back to your baby. Remember, it's okay for babies to cry, if all their needs have been met. In these situations, allow yourself a quiet break by taking a shower or wearing headphones and listening to relaxing music.
As the caregiver, you need to take care of yourself well. If feeling of anger or depression continue, don't hesitate and ask for help. Especially with new mothers, it's expected that they'll need support through this new life event. Parents need to learn stress management to cope. Don't feel ashamed or afraid to admit that you can't handle it all by yourself.Learning to tolerate a crying baby is a skill that can be learned.
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